Category Archives: Goals

It Keeps Coming Back

Have you ever had it where you can’t get that song out of your head? You heard it that one time and then there it sat, just the few lines you remember, on repeat, all day. At first it was catchy and you really liked it but now you are frustrated you can’t stop it. Then one morning it is gone and you don’t even realize it, until some one comes along and mentions the song or says something that reminds you of the song. Then there you are back to where you started. Just a few lines, on repeat, all day. This has been happening to me lately but it is with a question that I heard recently rather than a song. I think about it all day, sometimes for multiple days in a row, and then one morning it is gone. Then someone comes up and asks me a question which triggers a thought process that leads me back to that same damn question again. Then I’m stuck again, thinking about that one question over and over. This has been my last two to three months. I keep coming back to one question no matter where I start. It could start many different ways.

  • Where are you off to next?
  • When are you leaving us next and for how long?
  • Why are we/am I here?
  • What do I want to do for the rest of my life?
  • What are my goals in life?
  • Am I where I should be?
  • Where am I going?
  • What do I truly love to do?

All of these questions lead me back to the one main question that is eating up the hours of my sleep at night. Some of you are probably thinking “Just tell me the damn question!” Others may be thinking “If you would just answer this stupid question then you wouldn’t have to think about it anymore.” To those of you with the first statement, I will tell you shortly. To those of you with the second statement I say, easier said than done (the rest of this post will prove that to you).

The first time I heard this question was when I clicked on a Facebook article which took me to a blog with a video imbedded in it. This is the video.

There are a few questions and thought provoking statements in this video but the one that really stuck with me is….

Drum-roll Please………

“What would you like to do if money were no object?”

The first time I heard that my brain did a backflip it got so excited! Then it was flooded with thoughts and ideas and I’m pretty sure I had a nap shortly after because my brain was so overloaded. There are SO MANY things I would do if money was no object. If I could just go and do the things I love to do and not have to worry about money……the list is endless!

  • Traveling
  • Working out
  • Helping others reach their goals and dreams
  • Playing sports
  • Eventually getting a house and having a gym and mini library in it.
  • Build/design that house myself
  • Live in the middle of nowhere
  • Hike every day
  • Go back to school

Those are just the broad categories to which my brain goes to fish out different ideas, story lines, possibilities, opportunities, directions, and plans. Each having multiple different streams to follow and directions to go. For example: Traveling may take me to Europe for a year or two. It could take me back to Oz or New Zealand for a year or two. I might just go explore British Columbia here in Canada for a week or a few months, by myself or with a tour group. And any of those places might be the final resting spot for my house and eventually a family. From there the other categories look very different depending on the rout my traveling takes. If I go to Europe would I work for the whole time, would I travel first then pick a spot to work, or would I work for a bit and then travel? If I went to Oz, because I already wasted my work/holiday visa, would I get someone to sponsor me to work there, or would I try to get into University to learn about psychology and/or creative writing? Again these are just a few examples of how that one questions has woven itself into a very complicated and criss-crossed web.

Now that you know the question and how my brain tries to go about finding an answer, lets talk about it a bit (for those of you who watched the whole video you will have maybe picked up on some of this already, but for those of you who skipped that part I’ll recap a bit for you). “What would you like to do if money were no object?” You may be saying “But that is what money is, an object.” Okay sure, thinking outside the box for a bit here though, if you didn’t have to worry about money then what would you do? If you knew that no matter what you chose to do, the money would work out in the end. What would you do? Would you travel more? Would you finally get your dream job rather than the one you hate to work at now? Would you move to that city you visited and loved when you were 21? “What would you like to do if money were no object?”

For such a simple looking question it can take up a lot of time and energy. TRUST ME! Now, taking up time and energy isn’t always viewed as a good thing but I think in this case it is. It has lead me to dream, understand myself better, and explore ideas I never thought about before. There are two parts of the video really make this central question resonate with me.

Part 1: If you focus on getting the money you will end up doing things you don’t like doing so you can go on living, doing the things you don’t like doing, which is STUPID! I especially like how he says “which is stupid” at the end.

Part 2: “Better to have a short life that is full of what you like doing, than a long life spent in a miserable way.”

Part one is a play off of something I have never understood. Why do we work so hard just so we can buy things to impress people we usually don’t even like? I would way rather have someone like me because I am true to who I am and love what I do, than have someone like me because I have fancy boat. What happens if I don’t have that boat anymore? Or if the neighbour gets a nicer boat? People can always have nicer things than you do, or take your things away from you. People can not take you away from you. People can not take away that passion you have for travelling, sports, art, or music. I would argue that those passions and things you love could more part of you than your own hand is. Your hand can be taken from you, but your passion can not.

Part two is something I have lived my life by since the start of my university career. Half a semester in to Engineering I hated it. And even though people had told me I would be great at it, I would like it, I would make a ton of money at it. I knew I had to make a change. I wasn’t enjoying anything to do with engineering, I hated classes, I hated my profs, I hated the idea that I would probably end up behind a desk looking at dials and numbers ( I know there is more to it than that, but you get my point, I didn’t like it). The only thing that was “good” was the money at the end, and I hated that. I couldn’t handle seeing myself with lots of money but hating my job, and ultimately my life, every day. The money I may have got wasn’t worth it. So I switched to Kinesiology to become a Personal Trainer. And I loved it. Classes were actually enjoyable, I actually wanted to learn about it, it was sporty and my life has always revolved around sports, it was a great fit. The only downside was, I wouldn’t make very much money in this industry (at least that was what I was told and what was generally accepted). But I didn’t care. I knew that if I loved my job and my area of work that I would want to learn as much about it as possible and that would make me a great trainer. I also knew that if I loved my job it would show and that people would gravitate towards that. I never really worried about the money because I knew that If I loved my job I would work hard at it and that would get me opportunities and then the money would kind of just…….work. I won’t lie, there were some pretty tight times and there is bound to be some more ahead of me as well, but I know that if I continue to work and enjoy what I do then it will work out. Or I will find a way to make it work because I have the drive and passion and I won’t give up on it.


So, here I am again back at that same damn question. “What would you like to do if money were no object?” I still don’t have an answer, and I don’t know if I ever will. I’m thinking it might even change over time, I don’t know. All I do know is that I have general ideas as to what I think I want my life to look like. What I think I need to have in my life so that I could wake up every day and be happy. Happy to go to work. Happy to be with the people I am with. Happy to be alive. Happy to have possibilities and opportunities. Excited about what every day could have in store for me. I don’t know exactly what all that is but I am going to try my best to line up the things that I think will get me as close to that kind of happy as I possibly can get. Hopefully one day I can tell you all exactly what I would like to do and what makes me happy.

Until then, Stay Positive, Be Better, and Go Get It!

The Champions Mind by Jim Afremow, PhD

win

So writing book reviews are hard even when you enjoy the book…. especially when you enjoy the book. I have had to do a few different book reviews over my time as a university student but never was it this hard to keep it short. I have so many good things to say about this book and there were so many sections that helped me, I just want to basically rewrite the book. But I’m not going to because that would not be a REVIEW and it would be super long, and this post is already….not short.

This book has completely changed how I think and act when it comes to sports and even life in general. It has helped me to set goals, see the positives in every situation, not beat myself before I even start, and taught me many other things that have made my training and, more importantly, my life more enjoyable.

After reading this book and now reviewing it, it seems to me that the first seven chapters give you mental tools and small examples of those tools. It is the first two chapters that I found most interesting and helpful, especially the second. Then they have a chapter all on Olympic level athletes and how they used the tools to get to that level. These stories were interesting and helped me to see how others put the tools into play. The last three chapters talk about taking all the tools you were introduced to in the first seven chapters, and read about other people using for Olympic level training, and how you take those skills and mold them into your own game plan and mental training. This section was much easier to get through as it again had some information that I found quite valuable. So what parts of the book did I find the most helpful? In the following paragraphs I am going to touch on my favourite three chapters and how they each made an impact on my life.

The first chapter; Be Your Own Champion has a lot of good questions and thought provoking statements throughout it. The section The Champion Question has one of the best questions. It will get you thinking about what you need to do, and stop doing in order to be the best version of yourself. The question? “What will your life look like when you have become your own champion?” So think about what your day, work, and/or training session would look like when you are a champion. What things would you do differently, what would you add into your life, and what things would you not do because they affect you negatively?  Other questions from this chapter that really got me thinking were “How will I be a champion today?” and “How was I a champion today?” You would ask these of yourself when you wake in the morning and when you go to bed at night, respectively. I found that asking myself how I will be a champion today helps me to prioritize and focus my day ahead.

A couple other sections of this first chapter that I really liked are called The Champion’s Will-Do-Now List and Lead By Creed and Deed. They both list ideas that will help keep you on task, stay positive, and motivate others. So for me, being a lists guy, these two sections were very attractive to me. The Champions Will-Do-Now List has some really good points to ward off procrastination. Things like scheduling out your day, and making sure that it is a realistic schedule. Setting priorities and being organized help tremendously as well. If I have my meals planned out and figure out which project I am going to work on at what time throughout the day I get way more done. If I just ‘let it happen”, there is a lot of nothing that ends up happening. The other point that is brought up is to keep your work area clean. The less clutter at your work desk, or station, the less stress you will have. Lead By Creed and Deed had some really good points about leadership. These are the ones I found hit me the most:

1. Develop a vision for success and stay enthusiastic pursuing it.

2. Great leaders invite feedback from others as opposed to blocking criticism. Always share credit and accept blame.

4. Care, really care, about others. Take an interest in the person wearing the uniform, not just that person’s performance.

6. Realize that your impact goes beyond your performance; lead by example, on and off the field.

9. Share in all of the sacrifices and hardships of the team, never asking others to do what you are unwilling to do.

This first chapter also goes on to talk more about working within a team, whether that is in sport or outside of sport, as well as how to deal with change and disappointment.

My favourite chapter in this book is chapter two; Master The Mental Skills. This chapter explains mental skills and drills that will help you attain a champion’s mindset so you can achieve your full potential. Goal Setting is the first section in this chapter and rightfully so I think. I think it is one of the most crucial parts of becoming the best you you can be, hence why I wrote a whole post just on goal setting (Goals. Of the hockey sort, or maybe not) and why I will probably write more eventually. Without goals there is little direction for your action. Another section I really liked in this chapter was Self-Talk. This section has a very interesting story “Feed the Good Wolf”, which was some of the inspiration behind my post Why Not Be Positive. If you have not heard this story or legend (I prefer to call it a legend because to me that makes it more powerful) you are missing out. For those of you who have not heard of “Feed the Good Wolf” here is the LEGEND:

A grandfather explains to his warrior grandson that there are two wolves within each of us: One wolf is positive and beneficial, while the other wolf is negative and destructive. These two wolves fight for control over us. The grandson is curious and asks, “Which wolf will win?” The grandfather replies, “The one you feed.”

BOOM. There it is. Short. Sweet. To the Point. How you talk and think to yourself will effect how you perform, live, and feel. Make sure your thoughts and words feed the good wolf.

There was a lot of good information in all the other chapters but the one other chapter that I found helpfull was chapter seven: Zen in The Zone. Chapter seven is another very interesting chapter and one I found very useful. It has different stories about teaching Zen along with how it can be connected to sports and a self-reflection question to further your thinking. Below are the sections I found most helpful.

Maybe – The story that goes with this one is that a farmer keeps saying maybe to things. It starts out the farmer had a horse run away and his friends came over and said “such bad luck”. The farmer said ‘maybe”. then the next day the horse came back with four more wild horses. “Such good luck”, the farmers’ friends said. “Maybe”, said the farmer. The next day the farmer’s son tried to ride one of the wild horses and fell off and broke his leg. “Such bad luck” said the farmer’s friends. “Maybe” said the farmer. The next day military officers came to draft young men into the army and seeing the son’s broken leg, passed him by. Not judging an outcome until later when it has had time to play itself out to its entirety will help you to keep calm and relax. This section was also part of the reason I wrote the blog Sometimes You Win and Sometimes You Learn, Because There is a Reason. which has to do with not judging things right away. Sometimes “bad” things happen but then days, weeks, or sometimes years later you are thankful for that “bad” thing because it taught you something or allowed you to do something you otherwise would not have done. Self-reflection question: Do I stay calm and centered when the sport gods hurl hardships my way?

Working Very Hard – The story for this one is slightly confusing and it isn’t until after they explain it that I understood what it meant. Basically it means that you need to be focusing on what you are doing in the moment, day-to-day, rather than worrying so much about the end result you want. If you are always looking where you want to end up then you are not giving the attention to detail that your day-to-day activities require and thus will not get to your end goal. Take care of the process and the results will take care of themselves. Self-reflection Question: Am I just mindlessly working hard, or am I aware of what I am doing?

The King and the Peace Contest – This story is kind of weird and long but basically it gets at that real peace comes from inside yourself. Staying calm mentally in a big game or situation is very crucial to the success of that game or situation. The only way external factors can affect your mental calmness is if you let it. Self-refection question: Do I keep cool and composed in the heat of competition?

Breathing – Practicing deep breathing will ease stress and bring about a state of relaxation. When you breath shallow oxygen intake decreases and muscle tension increases. So you want to relax? Deep breaths! Self-reflection question: Do I breathe easily and deeply throughout my day?

Destiny – You control your own destiny. You can only accomplish what you profoundly believe you can accomplish. Therefore believe that you are destined for great things in your sport and work hard in your daily tasks to achieve your dreams. Self-reflection question: How great could I play if I thought and acted as if it were impossible to fail?

Chasing Two Rabbits – This one is really simple. He who chases two rabbits catches neither. Pick one thing to work on and really go for it. Self-reflection question: Do I place all of my energy and effort on doing one good thing at a time?

These simple zen stories, along with others, really helped me to get myself into “the zone” for training sessions, gave me inspiration for other blog posts, and help me perform my job to the best of my ability. Like I said earlier these three chapters were my favourite but I did learn a lot from the other chapters as well.

Chapter three: Be In It To Win It contains sections like coming up with a slogan, what music you listen to, staying within yourself, and trusting your abilities. Chapter four; The Wisdom of A Champion speaks to mistakes, failures, knowing your why, and controlling what you can. Chapter five; Exercise, Nutrition, Pain, Injuries, and Regeneration is about exactly what it says it is about. The difference with this one is that each section has points and steps to help you work through injuries, nutrition, etc.

Chapter six: Take Control of Your Personal Destiny has psychological studies that will give you information on tools like meditation, how performing sports in a group can help or hinder your performance, and the benefits of a gratitude journal.

Chapter eight: Golden Reflections is the chapter that has all the stories of the Olympic athletes. Chapter nine: Your World-Class Game Plan starts with a mental game scorecard where you rate yourself on the different aspects of your mental game. This chapter then goes on to talk about how to prepare for a game, practice, big event, change, etc. Chapter ten: Long-Term Survival of The Most Mentally Fit has many examples within it of athletes who were or have been very successful in their respective sports for a long time and how they did it. Things like setting golden priorities, being resilient, or not overextending yourself. There is then a very short Epilogue: The Ultimate Victory is Yours and two very important lists in the Appendixes. The first is Be a Champion Student-Athlete and the second is Be a Champion Sleeper.

This book also had tons of great quotes, so last but not least I leave you with some of my favourite quotes out of this book. There are many to choose from but these are the ones that really hit home for me.

QUOTES:

“Champions aren’t made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them – a desire, a dream, a vision.” – Muhammad Ali

“The vision of a champion is someone who is bent over, drenched in sweat, at the point of exhaustion when no one else is watching.” – Anson Dorrance

“The time is now, the place is here.” – Dan Millman

“Every survival kit should include a sense of humour.” – Anonymous

“Warriors don’t slouch into battle.” Anonymous

“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” – Benjamin Franklin

As always Stay Positive, Be Better, and Go Get It!

Squat Every Day: Week 5

Fallen

Rest day on Wednesday was much needed and totally worth it! Did not do any training, just worked and read Game of Thrones. Then I was back at it Thursday. Thursday did some pause front squats, then on Friday I had Funsquat Friday. I did a snatch complex of one snatch deadlift, one snatch pull, and one hang snatch. I started at 95lbs and added 5lbs every minute to end at 165lbs. Then after a few attempts at 170lbs I got that one too. Looking back at it I should have done every 90 seconds because by the time I did the lifts and then changed the plates I usually had about 15 seconds “rest”. Saturday was a BIG day in many ways. Lots of training time (total of like 5 hours by the end of it all, with some chit chat during….), PR’d two lifts (14 more reps on “death by back squat” and 35lbs added to overhead squat), it was my birthday so I got lots of love from family and friends, and I ate a lot of food. I do think after the day I had I earned the extra two donuts, large blizzard, and supper out. Sunday was a fun day too. Another coach and I did “3 bars of death” which wasn’t what I first thought it was going to be but it turned out to be alright. Rather than back squat, deadlift, and press it was “Linda” (10 reps -> 1 rep of deadlift, bench press, and power clean) which I did in 22:21. After the last few days that I have had I was pretty happy with that. Next time I am going for a time under 20 min.

This up coming week I am getting back into my version of squat every day. Starting it off by working up to a technical max on unbelted and belted back squat. Basically this means I will probably get to about 95-97% of my true max on each lift. I do not want to go to failure this week but rather, go till I hit a really heavy single but maintain good form throughout the lift. Then I will be moving into some pause squats, tempo squats, and my second favourite variation of squat….the front-back squat. I also have close grip bench press on one day, lunges on four days, and deadlift on two days.

In the next two weeks I will have four deadlift days. I plan to make one of them into a three pause deadlift, pausing at knee, thigh, and hip. I messed around with it this week and think it would be beneficial to me as my deadlift is not very consistent and it will force me to keep good form throughout the lift. Over those same two weeks I have two bench press days, one of which I am going to try pause bench where I pause for a full second with the bar on my chest. I am still going to keep Funsquat Friday and as luck would have it this week I do front-back squats on Friday so I will most likely just leave that there.

The thing that I am really excited about is that I am back to looking forward lifting again. After my crappy start to last week I was in the dumps about this whole squatting thing and really was not happy about it at all. After the last three days I have had  this week though I am back to being excited about lifting and looking forward to start again and seeing what the next 3-4 weeks will bring.

Links to the previous weeks:

Squat Every Day: Week 1

Squat Every Day: Week 2

Squat Every Day: Week 3

Squat Every Day: Week 4

Stay Positive, Be Better, and Go Get It!

Goals. Of the hockey sort, or maybe not.

This post started off being about thinking positive and mentally preparing for workouts and other events in your life and then slowly shifted focus. In honour of the hockey season starting this past week I decided that “goals” may be an appropriate topic. As a defence-man I am usually concerned with stopping goals. However, today I am shifting to the offensive a bit and addressing the topic of setting goals. It’s a mash-up of things I have learnt in university classes, books I’ve read, and methods that have worked for me and other individuals I know.

I feel that goal setting is important, as it gives you a sense of direction and accomplishment. The goals you can set can be related to an endless list of things. Health, family, work, sports, and school to name a few large categories. Things like why are you working out today?  Are you trying to get stronger? Or are you trying to get faster, or work on your endurance? Maybe you want to just be able to do a full squat today with good form. Maybe you need to take an hour out of your day to read something that you can learn from. Or if you are super busy all the time and hardly ever sit down and relax, your goal could be to sit down and ENJOY reading a book, having a nap, or watching a TV show. Maybe you want to finish that project, report, assignment, paperwork, or blog post by the end of the day (my goal for the last week…oops). There are tons of goals you can set within one day that can help to make you a better person, parent, employee, hockey player, etc (this list of things you can improve on is also endless; whatever you do, you can always improve at it). I find that if I do not wake up and determine a few goals for the day then I end up doing nothing, going through the motions, and I end the day frustrated because I feel like I didn’t accomplish anything (usually because I don’t). Whereas if I have some goals for that day, even if I didn’t fully achieve them, I feel like I at least accomplished something and improved myself in some way.

Sure setting a goal and not reaching it isn’t always the best. It can leave you disappointed and feeling like you are just wasting your time. Sometimes that is the case, and sometimes we need those failures or shortcomings to bring us back to reality so we can work harder next time. Sometimes it just isn’t your day and you accept it and move on. Think about it this way: maybe you did not get exactly the outcome you wanted but at least you made some progress, you are better for it now than before you started working on that goal. At the very least you know that way doesn’t get the outcome you want, and next time you can try a different approach. You can’t go into the gym every day and set personal records, just like you can’t reach every single goal you ever set. Part of that is because some days you just don’t have your best stuff, but also if you are reaching every single goal you set then you aren’t challenging and pushing yourself as much as you could be.

When I am setting goals I try to use SMART Goals. Most of you have probably heard of SMART Goals but incase you haven’t or need a refesher here is an overview.

SMART Goals:

S – Specific

Your goals should be specific in that it has an end date, dollar amount, can be broken down into smaller bits, and/or a list of items you will need in order to achieve the goal.

M – Measurable

A goal being measurable means that you can track your progress. Be that through the time, dollar amount, smaller goals accomplished to work towards the bigger goal, or what items you have collected.

A – Attainable

It has to be within your wheel house. That being said challenge yourself. Don’t make it a sure thing, make it just a little bit better, higher, harder than that sure thing. You will be surprised what you can do when you really put your mind to it and challenge yourself.

R – Realistic, Relevant, Re-evaluate

Your goals should be something that is possible within your life and should help you to get you where you want to go.  You may also need to re-evaluate your goals every once in a while as things in your life change, or as you get ahead of your goals, or if you bit off more than you can chew.

T – Time-Bound

Your goals NEED an end date or time. Within each goal you should have smaller “check-points” that also have end dates so that you can track your progress. Don’t just set one goal for a year from now, chances are you will procrastinate and not reach that goal. Or you will have this awesome big goal but not know what steps to take to achieve it. I find it helps to also have little goals you can achieve every 4 months. Then within that 4 month goal you could have goals that break down to 1 month, then a few weeks, then even every day or two. Again the more specific you get with things like end dates, and breakdown of goals, the better chance you have of achieving that goal.

So when setting goals for yourself make them SMART. Also make sure to challenge yourself a little bit and see how good you can really get. If things don’t go your way don’t get discouraged. If you don’t reach your goal, you at least made some sort of progress. You may not be where you want to be but you are closer now than when you started. Or if you have not mode much progress it is not the end of the world, at least you know that the approaches you have taken so far are not going to work and now you learn from them and come at that goal with a new and improved approach.

Now go out there, set some goals and make yourself and your life better, you deserve it!!

BONUS INFO:

To help you with goal setting I will give you an example of a goal I have.

One of my main goals is to take at least one hour every day to work on something to improve myself. As a personal trainer this mostly comes in the form of a workout. And within each workout I always set a goal. Whether it is to get a new personal record on a strength lift or try to complete more rounds in a conditioning workout than I did last time. Within this “hour per day” goal I know that the workout part comes easy for me so I also make a point to take at least an hour each week to read a book. Depending on how my day was and what time it is will determine what kind of book I will read. Sometimes it is a novel, other times it is a book that I can learn from (textbooks, anatomy books, mental coaching books, do it yourself books etc.). Another area I struggle in is stretching or mobility so I also make a point to work in an extra hour worth of stretching or mobility work that comes outside of my workouts.  There are a few more areas of my life I hope to add to the list such as mental and spiritual. Also for this to be even more effective I could add in exact amounts of time per area per week rather than “at least…”, or I could have a notebook or whiteboard to keep track of the hours I spend doing different things each week, month or 4 month block.

Hope this was helpful.

Go Get It